When we went to the restaurant we got the voucher for, we thought we were being taken to die. It was really far and we had to drive through these ghetto neighborhoods and out taxi driver was pretty sketchy. We asked him to not kill us and he took us straight to the restaurant. On the beach. It was gorgeous and completely unexpected. All the tables were on the shore and each seat was facing the water. We could sit and watch the planes fly onto the runway. Our menu was already chose, and it was mostly fish that stayed in the fishtanks inside until it was time to cook them. So delicious. Helle ate her first lobster there, a whole kilo! There was a tiny band going from table to table singing songs which everyone enjoyed. After dinner (and a couple bottles of wine) we were pretty much the only people there, so we hijacked their guitar and sang for them. Helle played "Ironic" and "Last Kiss" on the local's guitar and we sang along. It was also where we learned a great deal of Indonesian because we made friends with all out waiters. The other tables resented us a little because their waiters started to ignore them to hang out with us. Take THAT, boring tables!
A couple days later we hired a driver to take us around the island. We went to a monkey forest and had a pretty crazy time there. Monkeys were just EVERYWHERE. It was just like Jumanji. Especially when I went to hold a monkey's hand and the mofo BIT ME. right in the arm. I had to get tested for rabies because I wasn't sure if he was rabid. So for a few days, I had to live with the possibility that death was somewhat imminent. How fun. Nasty, Jumanji monkey....
So a couple nights later we stopped by a place we had been wanting to go to called Tequila Bar. We were one of two tables in the restaurant so I started being loud and making friends with the house band. The lead singer was really sweet and asked us to come up and sing. We ended up having so much fun we stayed up there for about six songs. She really enjoyed having us to sing with, however I am not convinced we were exactly bringing in the business. Didn't matter! We had such a good time.
On our way from that bar to another place, we were hassled by some little kids trying to get pity money from tourists. At this point, Helle and I were pretty buzzed and she didn't feel like giving money to this kid who had started following us. She looked at me and said "He may be fast, but he's not faster than us!" and took off! She actually raced a poor boy and I was laughing the whole way behind her.
Sometimes people would come up to us and ask us to enter their store or try and sell us something or whatever and it got so annoying we tried out different ways to get rid of them. We learned the Bali way to say "We have no money" and "No, thank you." When that didn't work I told Helle to start yelling urgently at people in Danish. That was really fun because when they don't understand why you are yelling urgently, they panic too. We also picked up that "hati, hati" meant "Caution!" so that was also a fun one to yell at people as we walked by.
Once we got to the next bar, we spent most our time in the dance area. There were a lot of stages for people to get up on and dance, not to mention a few cages. Helle and I were up on stage with about 100 other people at one point, but I remember her telling me we were getting off because everyone "had found their safety buddy." It was pretty hysterical at the time because so many people had paired off on the stage it honestly looked like it was "Safety buddy" time.
When we left Kuta Beach and went to Uluwatu we had some pretty memorable experiences. The first day I went off by myself to walk along the shore and happened to stumble across some dumb guy pleasuring himself behind a rock. That was incredibly unfortunate and I ran away. Too bad for me, the tide had not gone out yet so I ruined my poor feet running on shells and rocks trying to get far enough away from this loser. Luckily I found two women from California who hung out with me until he walked off. They were a mother and daughter and the mom was pretty badass when I told her what happened. She started yelling at him and telling him to get away, etc.
That night, Helle wakes me up at 5 am because she hears a strange noise on her side of the room. We had to leave our window open in order to get some cool air, and we had been warned that monkeys liked to enter the room to find food. So here I am at 5 am thinking that another damn monkey has come to bite me. I hop out of bed and turn the lights on and Helle and I enter the bathroom to find a massive crab scaling the wall. We sort of stared at it for a while deliberating what to do, and finally decided we had to go upstairs and wake up our host. (Now, it's so hot in Bali that you don't exactly need to wear a lot of clothes when you sleep, so my favorite line that night was definitely when Helle asked herself, "What am I going to wear?" then replied, "that's the least of my problems at a time like this!") We ended up catching it in a giant pot and hopefully they ate it for dinner the next days. Or for breakfast! A crab omelette!
I think that is mostly it for the written memories. For pics, you can go to my facebook page:
https://www.facebook.com/media/set/?set=a.10100525295809908.2541853.12713738&type=3&l=96424dca3b
and
https://www.facebook.com/media/set/?set=a.10100525314881688.2541859.12713738&type=3&l=d3631b0c6a
And be sure to check out the monkey who stole the ciggies.
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